From a poor end to the last quarter of 2017 (very little cycling for me, and very low motivation to actually do any) to the start of January 2018. A Mallorca trip had been in the wings for ages between our group of boys, but it was Tom who put a steak in the ground and got a date in the calendar for us in the first weekend of May (as well as booking flights, accommodation and most of the rest at a later date).
A rank helping of the flu during the first week in 2018 meant that my ‘training’ had to wait until mid Jan. I started off with an old favourite on the turbo – 3 x 10 starting off at 200w. I couldn’t get through the second set and the reality set in that I had a lot of painful work ahead of me to get into shape for Mallorca – 12 weeks away.
So, I got on it. Started riding the turbo regularly, regular commutes and weeekend rides (where I was getting dropped regularly and just trying to hold the wheel) helped me get my cycling fitness back up to somewhere near what I would call normal. The game changer was Zwift. My friend had zealously spoken about Zwift and how much I would love it, but I was resisting the cost of investment in a smart turbo trainer. However, one weekend ride I was out with Chris and he was going really well, and I considered that his form must be due to his Zwifting, so I started looking for a Kickr Snap. Fortunately I found one at a reasonable cost on eBay, and then I was Zwifting.
First thing to do was an FTP. That hurt, but in terms of output I was really pleased with what I had managed to stick out (291FTP) and gave me confidence that I was improving. Zwift turned out to be a brilliant motivational tool, and I replicated my own workouts on Zwift, rode in groups, raced and rode virtually with other friends and colleagues. It was great. I continued with a pretty structured cycling routine;
Monday eve – turbo
Tuesday- rest
Wednesday- turbo
Thursday – commute
Friday – rest or turbo
Saturday- rest or turbo
Sunday- weekend ride
This felt like a lot of turbo and not so much road, but with the weather so shit in the UK and the time convenience of having a turbo set up in the garage I was happy with that.
Feeling pretty good with my physical fitness (7Kg lost from Jan to May), the trip was getting nearer and it was time to think about bike packing. I borrowed a Rose bike box from a mate and started working out what I needed to take with me.
Leading up to the trip, life was busy with family stuff and work was pretty stressy and I found myself spending last minute evenings wondering about appropriate gearing, and when the actual fuck I would fit everything in that needed to be done. In any case, evenings in the garage during the week of the trip sorted everything out and I had a packed bike and some kit to take with me the night before departure. Some last minute faffing with packing locations of certain items and then Laura dropped me off at the train station with the seemingly enormous on the outside and small on the inside borrowed bike box.
Bill had a nightmare the night before departure. He noticed a crack in his carbon bike’s chain stay, and had to quickly develop a Plan B. He ended up taking his titanium CX bike with road wheels fitted. Last minute stress – always happens somehow.
Weather forecast in Mallorca was shit. Annoying, but the sun was out in the UK for the train journey down to Stansted Airport. Train was busy and I don’t think I helped that with the carriage of my bike box which had to sit in the aisle near the back of the train.
Airport was busy and had undergone renovation since I was last there. Mick, Tom and Bill had arrived just before me (by car) and Duncan was running a little late with his bus from London. A nice meeting with everyone feeling the relief of finishing work and having everything packed up and then we checked in, dropped the bike boxes off and headed through security. Tom had packed all his tools in his carry on so had to unpack and show the staff his tools, his re-packing was disgusting and hard to watch for some of the group who have a healthy slice of OCD. Duncan had a similar tale, whereby the staff would not allow his torque wrench to be taken through. No palatable options were offered so Duncan had to leave the wrench at the airport. He’d have to pick it up on the return route for a fee of course.
On the plane to Mallorca. There are some proper London geezers, gym goers, clubbers, sleeve tattoo’s £60 on booze during the flight…
Upon being presented with the opportunity to meet someone who might influence one of the groups income, the guy said; “mate, I will stick my head right up his arse, I’ll be shoulders deep in that bloke”. Very interesting conversation between some lively lads. The Lads got asked to be quiet by the air hostess, a guy had complained about swearing and the volume of their chat. The response from the guys who we later referred to as ‘Row 13’ was; “get some bigger fuckin headphones mate, theres only half an hour of the flight left, we’ll fuck off then and you’ll never see us again”. Exceptional.
Flight was easy, bikes took a while to come but all arrived safely. Transfer was excellent, there was a guy waiting for us and he had a bike carriage trailer with him. Arrived to the excellent Airbnb house after a 25 minute transfer, bottle of wine, bikes built up. Bed at 2.15am.
Day 1 – 99Km Andraxt
Slept pretty well, woke around 7.30 then fell asleep again and didn’t wake till 9.45. Mike and Bill took care of breakfast very well; porridge, granola, eggs, bread, coffee and orange juice.
Clothing sorted, route decided, bikes checked over and we were off. We had decided on one of Duncan’s routes that took us on a rectangular route south west from Bunyola down to Andraxt and then North along the UNESCO World Heritage coastline to Valdemossa. Forested hairpin climbs and ragged mountainous coastline shrouded in misty rain made the day memorable for all.
A relaxed coffee stop in Esporles was enjoyable before we continued on the ride. A very late lunch was consumed in a welcoming restaurant around Estellencs – coke, spaghetti bolognaise, apple tart and coffee refuelled us and we missed the worst of the rain whilst eating. Bonus. The remainder of the ride was more of the same from earlier and was mostly wet. We arrived home very wet and happy with our days ride. Clothes and bodies washed we headed out for supplies and for food. We found a great restaurant called Antic Grill. Great food and service.
Day 2 – 96K Randa
Breakfast – someone else made it and I was very grateful.
Weather was awful – persistent heavy rain was not shifting, so we got appropriately clothed and headed off to the monastery at Randa, knowing that we would be soaked within 5 minutes of riding. Despite the rain, I really enjoyed the days riding, we arrived at the foot of the climb (Puig de Randa) up to the monastery and it was pretty quiet – the odd car and bus with tourists in it was all the company we had aside from eachother. The climb up was short and enjoyable and memorably shrouded in mist and cloud. Atmospheric. Later we would look at Strava and realise that we climbed up in 19 minutes and that Cancellara has the KOM at 9:55. Ridiculous.
We had a freezing cold descent, and decided to warm up at the bottom at a restaurant that Duncan had frequented previously. We had some pasta again and some almond cake and whilst waiting, some of the boys tried to dry themselves out under the toilet handdryer. Leaving the restaurant we faced an emerging sun and warming weather. We powered along the flat roads to Alara with the Carter brothers in their natural rouleur element. Once through Alara we were climbing up the Col d’ Orient in the sun, a tough climb that was rewarded with a cold beer at the top ahead of a really beautiful descent into Bunyola, where we were staying.
Once back at base the rest of the day flowed like this; kit off and in the washing machine, bath/shower, beer, wash bike, hang out, pizza, very full, bad movies, exhausted, bed.
Day 3 – 112Km Sa Calobra
Not great sleep, stomach cramping a lot. With breskfast it was difficult to eat without fear of puking or pooing, and I was on and off the toilet several times with and without success. The day was set to be the longest (and hardest) day of the trip, so I was a bit gutted about having bad guts but I decided that there wasn’t much I could do about it, so got kitted up and set off on route to Lloseta, Selva, and Caimari, where we stopped for a coffee (and a necessary toilet stop).
From Caimari we had beautiful climbing up towards the Col de Reyes and on to the top of Sa Calobra (stomach cramping every 10 minutes or so, or whenever I ate or drank anything).
The interesting thing about Sa Calobra is that you have to descend down it to come back up it, so on we went down to the port of Sa Colabora then back up. it was a tough climb and Mick had decided to see if he could beat his previous time up it (which he set a few years back when he first came to Mallorca), so he was off like a proper grimpeur whilst me and the Carter bros paced it up.
Duncan waited at the top as he’d done it 4 times already, and wasn’t up for punishing himself on the day. We all re-grouped at the top and then proceeded on along to reservoirs and tunnels before descending towards Soller and stopping for food at a restaurant half way down the descent. We sat out on a balcony for a while, but no service seemed to be happening out there so we traded the amazing view for moving inside and getting served. I had Spanish Omelette which I was able to keep down with a stomach settling ice cold Coke.
Bill was keen to find some smoothie bar that he’d been to before in the town of Soller, so Tom and Mick joined Bill, but me and Duncan wanted to push on back to base so we finished the descent down to the outskirts of the town and then headed up the Col de Soller. I was on max effort all the way back up the Col de Soller with Duncan. It was really great to push hard on that final climb, we both enjoyed not letting up. It was a lovely climb but was hard at that pace/effort and with all the cumulative Kms inside the legs. A great descent of the Col and then we had a few K’s of fast flat roads with a kick up to Bunyola for home. Once back at base; veg out, beer, Duncan left for an earlier flight than originally planned, shower, out for dinner. Second time in Café Tramuntana. Lasagne was so thick, stodgy and cheesy. Mistake. Back home veg out in front of TV. Bed.
Day 4 – Travel Back Home
2 episodes of stomach cramping during the night. Neither resulted in sickness thankfully. Up at 8am and straight into packing up the bike into the bike box. It’s always much easier the second time round so I had the bike packed in around 35 minutes, which was good for me. The boys sorted coffee and pastries which were welcome but which also catalysed my frequent trips to the toilet, due to this stomach bug (we put it down to the tap water as when the liaison for the house arrived she indicated that the well water in the house was cleaner than the tap water and that the tap water had only really just been desalinated, not cleaned).
Me and Mick went out for a short walk in the morning whilst waiting for the transfer pick up to arrive. Transfer was early at 10.25, but we were ready and the got the bikes loaded onto the trailer easily. One last look around the house and a goodbye to the house liaison and then we were heading off to Palma airport for our inbound flight.
Transfer was fine, the guy managed to perform a 3 point turn on a hairpin corner with the bike carriage trailer fitted. Impressive. Check in was quick as was getting through security (Tom was challenged on his hand luggage weight being >10Kg, so he had to get a load of stuff out and wear it! I think he was the only one who was checked because he had a large carry on case). Once through we moseyed through the duty free, picking up stuff we don’t need for our families, and then the lure of a Burger King proved too big to fight. Once consumed we headed off to our gate to join the rest of the returning Brits abroad.
Flight was on time and was fine aside from the party music, the screaming kids and the idiot who kept shouting out “Alan”.
Back in Stansted Airport it was really hot, we got through passport control really quick and the bikes also came through oversize baggage really quickly. I just ran out of time to get the 15.27 train, so relaxed and slowly made my way down to the station to get the 16.27 train instead. My wife would pick me up from Ely at 17.18 As beyond Ely it was a bus replacement service back to Stamford (typical for a Bank Holiday Monday).
Logistics
Stansted Express Train from Stamford station on Thursday afternoon (3pm).
Flight out; EasyJet to Palma.
Transfers in Mallorca by condetansfers.com
Accommodation Airbnb in Bunyola …
Food – breakfast at home, purchased food from local supermarket in Bunyola. Lunches and dinner out in restaurants.
Return flight with Jet2.com Palma to Stansted.
Train return to Stamford from Stansted Airport.
